123456

Why on earth i continue to do this, is a question i ask myself every time my dumb-addled brain decides to direct my girlish fingers towards a keyboard and start tapping out bullshit about bullshit. Well i am no closer to answering that as I am to understanding the popularity of marmalade - i mean i like it, i'm just surprised you do too? Anyway whatever the reason here i go again, so say your prayers, stay in school and don't take sweets from strangers whilst i bring us episode 3 (4) of the Aldershot Woes Again... 123456. 

If you are reading this blog, you are about to be struck with the rage of knowing you have just lost several points off your IQ and you have wasted a perfectly good 5 minutes you could have spent in a more enjoyable way, like having anal surgery or licking Anne Widdicombe's armpit. But along with the death rage slowing taking over your mind as you sift your way through this field of retardedisms, you have more than likely had to LOG ON to something in order to be here. 

Logging on is all together far to common these days in order to do almost anything you need a username and password. Don't get me wrong i'm not advocating some sort of security boycott, so some common criminal can steal our identities and sell it to fund terrorism, or whatever it is they do to fund terrorism these days. I am thankful of the measures put in place which mean all of my personal information is secure and no dirty member of Joe G Public can fiddle with my data like a frisky teen with his first boob. Only the faceless greedy corporation who own whatever it is i'm logging in to can do that.....oh?

The problem we have is we are encouraged to have different passwords for everything - for our email, our google+ accounts, facebook, twitter, netflix, pornhub, banking, amazon, ebay, turning our computers on pretty much every single technical aspect of our lives - you'll need a 16 character password with at least 1 numerical symbol and 2 capitols just to use the washing machine soon (well your wife will). At anytime we are expected to remember dozens of username variables and passwords just to make it through the day with out relying on tech-support. 

Well, that's how we are supposed to do it, a fresh password for everything... but that's not really how we do it ,is it? My entire life is at the mercy of one solitary password, crack that and i'm up fuck street with my trousers down. And according to Adobe in the wake of their great password bum-up most people are even worse than me. If you haven't read the story the abbreviated version is as follows - Adobe were hacked and some acne ridden keyboard anarchist took the passwords to over 2 million Adobe accounts. In the aftermath of that security breach Adobe have published the most popular passwords and the list includes some howlers... included in its top 20 were the classic "password" the self indulgent "iloveyou" and the Jackson inspired "ABC123". However the number one password of choice was the creative "123456" (closely followed in the number 2 spot by "123456789"). 

Now technophobes and PC literate Daily Mail readers will say this is greatly irresponsible of the end users and anyone who can be so reckless with their security deserves to have their accounts hacked, their dogs shaved and their mothers sent to work in mines. But its not our faults, we already have so much to remember and for every new password we commit to memory we squeeze some useful bit of information out of our brains. Useful footy knowledge or some nugget of TV trivia, the cure to polio, your dads birthday, why you like marmalade, why you don't like Mark Lawrenson, all this hard earned knowledge replaced with the password to your dishwasher (well your wifes). 

What cant be to far in the future is some sort of single sign in status - once your logged in to one your logged in to all, no faffing about or scribbling passwords on postit notes for us. And then not too long after that we can have finger print logins, then as that proves unsafe we'd move on to retina scans, but that would be breached sooner rather than later so in an act of complete online liberation and peace of mind we would have DNA access - AND THEN THEY OWN YOU. 

Well that was pointless and far too long, aren't you glad you logged in for that? A personal shout to Bernard Manning for providing the killer "your wife" material (smashed it Berny you racist unfunny cunt). 

Woe

@defmoss83 its like communication but more inflammatory.